Making the decision to improve ourselves by engaging with the process of Psychotherapy isn’t easy. So instead, we avoid it.
We do what we consider to be ‘the easy thing’ and get sucked into reading books, articles and Youtube videos on what we ‘think’ we need to do, in order to improve our lives.
However, unless we explore in-depth what we’re personally thinking and feeling in this present day, with the support of a Psychotherapist (for a period of years), we will not be able to implement the learning we discover in all these materials into our own lives, no matter how much we ‘think’ we are implementing them.
This is because we can’t be certain what we’re reading is actually what we’re struggling with and need in our lives to improve it.
A good indicator of this being, you’re still struggling to get the results you want to see in one or more areas of your life, which means you have beliefs, thoughts and feelings, you’re not consciously aware are impacting your life, and are preventing you from getting what it is you want.
Psychotherapy, therefore, (unlike the broader personal development space) supports you specifically in where you are in your thinking and feeling, in this very moment, so you can get to the bottom of what exactly it is you are struggling with.
It provides you with a personalised, tailored approach to the beliefs, thoughts, feelings and behaviours you engage with on a day to day basis and thus, are stopping you from achieving your life goals.
Therefore, a lot of the “guesswork” you undertake when searching in the broader personal development space, is taken out, as you are supported to explore what will actually be beneficial for you to explore, not what you “think” you need to explore.
Of course, it will take time since you’re likely to be broaching sensitive topics, which you will find challenging and you will be dealing with both your conscious and subconscious mind’s, however, I can promise you it will be worth the journey.
It may sound like a long process or you may think I can’t be bothered with that.
However, what if, Psychotherapy could bring you more results than you could have ever imagined or dreamed of? What if, it could support you in finding the happiness and progression in life you seek? What if, you were able to create different results to the results you have been creating in your life up until now? Then would you say you can’t be bothered with that?
Engaging with Psychotherapy
Clarity comes from engagement not thought
~ Marie Forleo
After reading a number of personal development books, and studying a number of individuals within the personal development space, the one thing they all agree on is, the only way to learn is to engage.
As Marie Forleo (Founder of Marie TV and author of the bestselling book ‘Everything is Figureoutable) says, ‘Clarity comes from engagement not thought’.
This means, let’s say you have an idea of a career change you want to make, rather than thinking over and over again whether or not to make the move, whether you’ll like it or you won’t, whether it might be a mistake or not, you need to find a way to engage with it, because it is only through engaging with it, getting stuck in and out of your head, will you be able to find clarity as to whether it is right for you.
This applies to Psychotherapy too.
You need to engage with Psychotherapy (for a year or more), to know if it works or not. You need to engage with Psychotherapy (for a year or more), to know if learning about yourself is what you’ve been missing in your life all this time. You need to engage with Psychotherapy (for a year or more), before judging and dismissing it as a source of support.
Why? Because I can produce lots of content on the benefits of Psychotherapy, why it’s important to seek it and how it has supported me, but none of it will make any difference to you or your life unless you engage with Psychotherapy yourself (for a year or more) to find out whether you can realise the benefits too.
How to engage with Psychotherapy
If you feel inspired to engage with Psychotherapy and you’re wondering what you can do next, I recommend going to your GP and asking them to provide you with a list of Psychotherapy practices in your area (which by the way is what I did).
You can, of course, get therapy on the NHS if you are based in the UK, but there is a long waiting list and I’m not certain the benefits will be the same as seeking a private Psychotherapist.
The GP will then most likely ask why you want to see a Psychotherapist, before handing you the list of practices in your area.
Once you have this, take a look at the list and check out the cost of each practice, although some do not give their prices on the list and the prices may vary depending on your circumstances.
Therefore, give one or more a call and get in-person consultations so you can see which therapist you might prefer.
Personally, I needed Psychotherapy immediately, so I committed to the one closest to my workplace, and luckily it worked out well for me.
Now, the first thought you might have is ‘it’s too expensive to get private therapy‘, which I completely understand and was in the same place you are before I started the process.
However, I would argue this is your fear talking to you, telling you to continue lying to yourself, telling you, you do not need Psychotherapy, convincing you, you and your life are okay as they are. It is a false alarm.
In which case, I recommend reading my blog post 3 fears standing in between you and a better life, because if there is one thing I am truly grateful for spending my money on, it is this, and if you think about it, when you’ve wanted something in the past, haven’t you found a way to afford it?
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